How to File for Divorce
Filing for divorce sounds like one big legal event. It usually isn't. For most couples, it's the last step in a longer process — and by the time you get there, the hard part is often already done.
A divorce is really three things:
Getting into agreement. Deciding how the marriage ends: property, debts, support, and, if you have children, parenting time.
Documenting the agreement. Putting it on the court forms your state requires.
Filing it. Submitting those forms to the court so the divorce becomes legally final.
This guide covers step three: what "filing" means, where it happens, what it costs, and what to expect after. Steps vary by state and county. Your state's page, linked below, has the details.
What "filing for divorce" actually means
Filing for divorce means submitting a petition (some states call it a complaint) to the family court in the right county. The petition formally asks the court to end the marriage.
The person who files is usually called the petitioner (or plaintiff). The other spouse is the respondent (or defendant). Filing first doesn't generally give either spouse an advantage in how property or custody is decided. It mostly determines who starts the paperwork.
Filing starts the court's clock. It doesn't finish the divorce. The divorce is final only when a judge signs the final decree (sometimes called a judgment of dissolution).
The filing process, step by step
1. Confirm you can file in your state
Every state has a residency requirement: a minimum time you or your spouse must have lived in the state before its courts can grant a divorce. The requirement ranges from none to a year or more, and some states also have county-level rules.
Your state page lists the current requirement.
2. Know whether your divorce is uncontested or contested
Uncontested: you and your spouse agree on all the major issues. This is usually the fastest, least expensive path, and it's what online divorce platforms are built for.
Contested: you disagree on one or more issues and the court may need to decide them. Contested cases usually involve more hearings, more time, and often attorneys.
Many couples start out disagreeing and reach agreement through conversation or mediation before they ever file.
3. Prepare your divorce paperwork
The forms depend on your state and your situation. Children, property, and support each add paperwork. A typical filing includes:
The petition or complaint for divorce
A summons or notice to the other spouse
Financial disclosures: income, expenses, assets, and debts
A settlement agreement (sometimes called a marital settlement agreement) if you've reached one
Parenting plan and child support worksheets, if you have minor children
Local cover sheets or case information forms some courts require
Paperwork mistakes are one of the most common reasons courts send filings back. See divorce papers for a full breakdown of the forms by state.
4. File with the court clerk
You file in the family court (or the equivalent) in the county where you or your spouse lives. Depending on the court, you can file:
In person at the clerk's office
By mail
Electronically, through an e-filing portal. Many courts now accept or require e-filing, and some limit it to attorneys.
The clerk stamps the petition, assigns a case number, and opens your file.
How to Divorce without a Lawyer
5. Pay the filing fee (or request a waiver)
Courts charge a fee to open a divorce case. It varies widely by state and county, and it's often a few hundred dollars. Some courts charge extra for things like a summons or a final hearing.
If you can't afford the fee, most courts offer a fee waiver (sometimes called in forma pauperis) based on income. Your state page lists current fees and waiver forms.
Filing fees are paid to the court, not to Divorce.com. They're separate from any platform or attorney fees.
6. Serve your spouse
The other spouse must be formally notified that the case was filed. This is called service of process. Common ways it happens:
Your spouse signs an acceptance or waiver of service. This is common in uncontested divorces.
A sheriff or professional process server delivers the papers.
Certified mail, where the state allows it.
After service, there's usually a deadline for the other spouse to respond.
7. Wait out any required waiting period
Many states have a mandatory waiting period between filing (or service) and when the divorce can be finalized. Some states have none, and others require several months. The clock runs even if you and your spouse agree on everything. See your state's divorce laws.
8. Finalize the divorce
In an uncontested case, finalizing often means submitting the signed settlement agreement and a proposed final decree. Some courts hold a short final hearing, and many don't require either spouse to appear.
Once the judge signs the decree, the divorce is official. Keep certified copies. You'll need them for things like name changes, refinancing, and retirement account transfers.
How much does it cost to file for divorce?
There are two separate costs:
Cost | Who you pay | What drives it |
|---|---|---|
Court filing fee | The court | Your state and county. Often a few hundred dollars, and waivable if you qualify. |
Preparation and support | You, a platform, a mediator, or an attorney | How much help you want, and whether the divorce is contested |
A contested divorce with attorneys on both sides typically costs far more than an uncontested divorce, mainly because of hourly billing on disputed issues. See how much a divorce costs for a breakdown.
How long does it take?
In an uncontested divorce, the timeline is mostly set by two things:
How long it takes you and your spouse to agree and complete your paperwork. You control this part.
Your state's waiting period and the court's processing time. You don't control this part.
Contested divorces can take much longer, depending on how many issues are disputed and how busy the court is.
Can you file for divorce without a lawyer?
Yes. Every state allows people to represent themselves in a divorce, which the courts call filing pro se or as a self-represented litigant. Many courts run self-help centers for exactly this reason.
Filing without a lawyer tends to work best when the divorce is uncontested and both spouses are ready to finalize an agreement. When there are safety concerns, a business, significant or complex assets, or serious disagreements about children, many people choose to work with a licensed attorney.
The options in between include DIY, online divorce services, mediation, and limited-scope ("unbundled") attorney help. They're covered in our guide to how to divorce without a lawyer.
Every situation is different. For advice on your specific circumstances, consult an attorney licensed in your state.
Can you file for divorce online?
It depends on what "online" means:
Preparing your paperwork online: yes, in every state. Online divorce platforms generate your state's forms from a guided questionnaire.
Submitting your paperwork online: it depends on your court. Some accept e-filing from self-represented people, some limit it to attorneys, and some still require paper filing.
Online divorce doesn't skip the court. It changes how the paperwork gets prepared, and in some cases how it's delivered.
How Divorce.com fits in
Divorce.com helps couples with the documentation and filing steps. It isn't a law firm and doesn't give legal advice.
Paperwork. Our questionnaire generates your state's divorce forms from your answers, with unlimited edits before filing.
Filing support. With We File For You, we review your forms for completeness, submit your petition to the court, and coordinate your spouse's signature and notarization. We can't guarantee a spouse will agree to sign. Court filing fees aren't included.
A case manager. A Certified Divorce Specialist (CDS®) walks you through the process and filing logistics. Case managers aren't attorneys and can't give legal advice.
Frequently asked questions
Does it matter who files for divorce first? In most states, filing first doesn't change how property, support, or custody is decided. The petitioner starts the paperwork and pays the initial filing fee. In some situations timing can matter, so if you're unsure, consult an attorney.
Do both spouses have to agree to a divorce? Every state allows some form of no-fault divorce, so in general one spouse can't prevent the other from getting divorced. Agreement mostly affects how the divorce happens: an uncontested divorce is usually faster and less expensive.
Where do I file for divorce? Usually in the family court (or the equivalent) in the county where you or your spouse lives, as long as the state's residency requirement is met. Your state page lists the specifics.
What if my spouse won't sign the papers? If a spouse won't sign or respond, most states have a process to move forward, often through formal service and, eventually, a default judgment. The rules vary. Your court's self-help center or an attorney can explain the options where you live.
How much is the filing fee for divorce? It varies by state and county and is often a few hundred dollars. Most courts offer a fee waiver for people who qualify based on income.
How long after filing is a divorce final? It depends on your state's waiting period, court processing times, and whether the divorce is uncontested. Some uncontested divorces finalize within weeks of the waiting period ending, while contested cases can take much longer.
Can I file for divorce if my spouse lives in another state? Generally yes, if you meet your own state's residency requirement. Issues involving children or property in another state can add complexity. Consult an attorney for advice on your specific situation.
This guide is for general information only and isn't legal advice. Divorce.com isn't a law firm. For advice about your specific situation, consult an attorney licensed in your state.
Filing for divorce in your state
Residency rules, forms, fees, waiting periods, and e-filing options vary by state. Choose your state for the specifics:
